“Crying can help one better manage their emotional stress and strengthen relationships as a result of a healthy, safe response to negative outcomes or situations,” says Michael Chen, M.D., a doctor and district medical director at One Medical. “Crying can help one’s mood by improving sleep, reducing inflammation, and strengthening the immune system.” Furthermore, research has shown that crying releases specific hormones in the body, such as oxytocin and endorphins, which help relieve physical and psychological pain while reducing other stress-related hormones such as adrenocorticotropic hormone (ACTH). “The first thing an infant does when entering the world is cry, and it’s a good thing,” Mary Joye, LMHC, tells mbg. “Babies have this innate reflex for assurance that someone will take care of their immediate needs. They have no vocabulary other than crying, and if no one comes, they can develop learned helplessness.” According to Joye, it may sound like the baby is self-soothing when they stop crying, but they may be giving up hope. This is one of several main reasons the inability to cry may carry into adulthood and cause emotional distress. “We tend to find that holding back one’s emotions and restricting the ability to cry can lead to negative outcomes such as chronic depression, anxiety, and difficult relationships,” Chen adds. “Crying is a reflexive biological response in most humans to an emotional state such as sadness, anger, and happiness,” Chen explains. “As humans reach adulthood, we learn to manage our crying response through learned, negative associations such as embarrassment and cultural expectations, affecting how one person easily cries compared to another.” But knowing the benefits of crying, these negative adaptations can sometimes contribute to depression and anxiety when crying is behaviorally restricted. This is why empathy and acceptance from caregivers are imperative to help people avoid developing these negative associations with crying. “Crying would ease physiological cycles of emotional flooding and numbing, but without release, the ability to process any emotions, including happy ones, becomes increasingly difficult,” Joye explains. In terms of physical disorders, keratoconjunctivitis sicca, or dry eye syndrome, is known to inhibit tear production. “Rarely, genetic medical conditions, such as familial dysautonomia, result in the lack of tear formation when one is in a state of emotional crying,” Chen adds. “The act of talking to a friend or other supportive individuals is another way to release one’s feelings and being able to process a difficult or negative situation,” says Chen. “Meditative breathing and exercise are other healthy activities that can help one release their emotional state.” According to Chen, recognizing and acknowledging one’s emotional state is a vital foundation in cognitive behavioral therapy, which is an effective evidence-based method for the treatment and management of anxiety and depression, and the act of crying is complementary to one’s exploration of these emotional states. “Visiting a professional in a nonjudgmental environment can be a catalyst for healthy crying,” Joye adds. “Many clients in therapy say, ‘I never cry.’ Some apologize, and this is an indication of a root cause that needs exploration.” And there’s always the tried-and-true cueing up of a classic tear-jerker. “Watching a sad movie is an expedient, self-help method to get tears to flow,” Joye says. “It is sometimes easier to cry about another’s pain than facing our own, but nevertheless, it cathartically releases pent-up emotions.” The saying “I need a good cry” is valid, so don’t be afraid to reach out for help from a trained professional and lean on your community and loved ones. You don’t have to go this alone. Know that the journey of expressing your emotions in a way that works for you may be a tricky one, but developing and cultivating self-compassion and gentleness during this time is imperative.
